Excuse Me While Cry Quietly in My Cubicle . . .

From the Department of YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FREAKING KIDDING ME!

Job Opening for Blogger:

The Murphy-Goode Winery has a “Really Goode
Job” for the right person. The Sonoma County winery is looking for
an outgoing, web-savvy, articulate communicator to tell the story of the
great mountain vines and artisan winemakers of California, tasting the
“goode” stuff and experiencing the unique Sonoma wine country.

“A Really Goode Job” will pay $10,000 a month for a six-month
contract that includes private housing in the heart of wine country:
Healdsburg, California.

thanks heather. no. really. thanks . . . a  lot . . .

Quote of the Day

Philosophers have long lacked a sense of humor, which puts them squarely on the road to being wrong about everything.

- TMST

Physical Therapy with Erica

Truth Be Told . . . .

**Screediness Warning**

In a  truthful world (sent by a friend). . .

Dear Client,

Although I have been working 70-hour weeks for as long as I can remember, I am taking time out of my busy day to let you know that I have received the 6 e-mails, 4 voice mails and 2 faxes you have sent regarding the same trivial matter.

The reason I have not responded (as hard as it may be for you to conceive) is that I have 2,486 other matters on my desk that are far more urgent and of a far more critical nature than the ridiculous item you have requested.

I will remind you that it is my ability to prioritize the truly urgent over the trivial that makes me so good at what I do and the whole reason that you continue to work with me.

In fact, the only thing slowing me down is reviewing the multiple e-mails, voice mails and faxes you continue to send me about the same issue. That and of course taking the time to explain to you why I cannot get you yesterday what you plan on requesting tomorrow.

Rest assured that while I may not get you what you want when you want it, I will get you what you need when you need it.

If you are wondering if I have received your multiple e-mails voice mails and faxes, the answer is an unequivocal YES provided that you have the ability to type out my e-mail address or fax number correctly (please feel free to print the previous sentence for future reference).

In the event that you are still dissatisfied, please feel free to contact our management. As far as I can tell their entire reason for being is to major on minors and deal with multiple complaints about trivial matters.

If you do not wish to contact our management, you may consider calling your mother I am sure she would be thrilled to hear from you (BTW I am not your mother).

Sincerely,

Medical Update - Summer Dreamin'

5:30am

The wife is nursing the wee one down the hall and I am sitting in another room at the keyboard . . . "When is our next Pediatrician appointment?' I holler . . .

"August" came the reply. Which stops me dead in my tracks . . . "August?" you mean 4 whole months between appointments?

When we first found out we were pregnant last February, it felt like we were on a train bound for parenthood with no opportunity to get off (not that we wanted to). When we received the SB diagnosis it seemed like that train tour through the countryside had become a run-away freight train.

When the doctors told us Annie probably wouldn't survive the birth, it was as if they had announced that our run-away freight train was headed for a ravine . . . and the bridge was out up ahead . . . 

Once little Annie was here, it felt like we had finally jumped off the train - right, smack-dab in the middle of Pamplona just in time for the Running of the Bulls . . . . There were neurology appts, Urology appts, Plastic Surgery appts etc . . .

Step one was to get out of the NICU

Step Two, get Annie's back healed

Step Three, casting for clubbed feet

Step Four, the big feet surgery

Throw in a couple trips to the ER, a double brain surgery and all manner of checkups and therapy appointments and it makes for two very tired and frazzled parents . . .

Just for kicks, I went back through our calendar and counted 64 medical appointments in the past 9 months. And those are just the ones I wrote down. I can think of 5-10 more off the top of my head . . .

But dare I say it? It looks like the end of this race is in sight . . . here is the full-meal-deal update:

Plastic Surgery - Done!

Pediatrics - One-year checkup in August

Neurology - Next checkup is at the SD Clinic in August

Urology - Urodynamic study in August to measure Annie's abilities in terms of bowels and bladder

Orthopedics - Casts changed out on May 26, then 5 more weeks of casts, AFO's after that for the foreseeable future

Occupational Therapy- Once a month for the foreseeable future

Physical Therapy - Once a week for the foreseeable future

We have been wanting to plan a beach day and a camping trip but both those will have to wait until the casts come off in June . . . but still . . . I can feel a lightening of the load.

Provided all goes as planned, the wee one will be cast-free by the end of June. Sure, there are a number of appointments in August, but they aren't what I would call "procedures".

It appears that the major hurdles are beginning to fade into the distance and by July little Annie's only concern will be to grow up relatively just like any other little girl her age.

The thought of celebrating her first birthday with all of this behind us makes me a little misty . . 

And you thought YOU were looking forward to summer . . .

Art Day at the TKA

580 Years Ago Today

Joan of Arc relieves Orleans

During the Hundred Years' War, the 17-year-old French peasant Joan of Arc leads a French force in relieving the city of Orleans, besieged by the English since October.

Tilt-Shift

Tilt-Shift photograpy is a method of photographing or filming that makes your subject seem miniturized. In this instance, the artist was able to film a rescue training exercise. Cool stuff.


Bathtub IV from Keith Loutit on Vimeo.

HT: Neatorama

220 Years Ago Today

Mutiny on the HMS Bounty

Three weeks into a journey from Tahiti to the West Indies, the HMS Bounty is seized in a mutiny led by Fletcher Christian, the master's mate. Captain William Bligh and 18 of his loyal supporters were set adrift in a small, open boat, and the Bounty set course for Tubuai south of Tahiti.

Don't You Wish You Could Be THAT Comfortable?

The Rock

I remember reading a book in school - I think it was called "The Cay". In any case, it had a photo of a blind black man on the cover with shockingly white hair and beard. I don't remember much about the story except that it was on an isalnd, there was a cat and it involved a hurricane. The boy and man in the story lashed themselves to a palm tree with rope to ride out the storm.

There are a number of people in our life that have been that tree to us this past year . . . . people who we have clung to for stability and support and, sometimes, for dear life. Today one in particular comes to mind.

The first person to befriend my wife when she moved from Oregon to California in high school - a friend in college who tirelessly worked behind the scenes of the singing / drama troupe the wife and I met in . . . a sharp wit, a sharp mind and an unbelievable memory . . . consistently delivering a 2x4 right between the eyes when you need one and offering a shoulder to cry on afterwards . . .

A constant source of strength and encouragement . . . she flew down from Sacramento the day after Annabelle was born just to be with us . . . she spent the night in the hospital with the wife when I was too exhausted to . . .

We are God parents to one of her beautiful daughters and for all the support and encouragement she has provided us throughout the years, timing and the miles have prevented her from the opportunity to ever hold little Annabelle in her arms. I don't think there is a person on this earth who loves Annie more who has not been able to hold her.

Happy birthday my "God-Sister" Heather, when we see you next there will just be more of our three girls to hug . . . all around . . .

Late Afternoon Dance in the Kitchen

Quote of the Day

"Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected."

- Red Buttons

True story: I worked for the Glendale YMCA during college heading up their teen programs. One summer the "Y" didn't (or wouldn't) find a permanent director for their elementary summer school program so five of the staff each had to take a two-week tour of duty as camp director. The counselors were the same all summer and the program didn't vary, so really you were there to provide an authoritative face to the kids and their parents.

The very first day of my stint as summer day-camp director, I showed up to the park early with donuts for the staff. There were some familiar faces and the counselors started giving me the run-down . . . "We check the kids in at that picnic table over there . . . the parents sign them out at the end of the day . . " and so on.

Then one of the counselors exclaimed, "Oh no . . "

"What?" I responded.

"Tavin is here . . ."

I turned to see a second-grader marching toward the table. He had an over-sized teenage-mutant-ninja-turtle backpack on and a mat of bleach-blond hair. He looked like a real-life version of Calvin from the Calvin and Hobbes cartoon.

Never one to back down from a fight (with a 7-year-old), I approached the little 3-foot terror and stuck out my right hand in greeting and said, "Good morning, Tav . . ."

That's when the little sucker punched me right in the yarbles.

And let me tell you, a little fist that size can be quite precise.

I went down like a sack of potatoes and he marched right on past without missing a step . . .

Good times.

And you thought Red Buttons was just being funny . . .

Let's see . . . Tavin would be about 27 by now . . .  where's that phone book . . .?

Great Stuff

Noteboek from Evelien Lohbeck on Vimeo.

HT: Neatorama

So Cute I have to die now . . .

Quote of the Day

"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."

- Robert Orben

Infant Joy

by William Blake

"I have no name;
I am but two days old."
What shall I call thee?
"I happy am,
Joy is my name."
Sweet joy befall thee!
Pretty joy!
Sweet joy, but two days old.
Sweet Joy I call thee:
Thou dost smile,
I sing the while;
Sweet joy befall thee!

Aunties

445 Years Ago Today

William Shakespeare born

According to tradition, the great English dramatist and poet William Shakespeare is born in Stratford-on-Avon on April 23, 1564. It is impossible to be certain the exact day on which he was born, but church records show that he was baptized on April 26, and three days was a customary amount of time to wait before baptizing a newborn. Shakespeare's date of death is conclusively known, however: it was April 23, 1616. He was 52 years old and had retired to Stratford three years before.

For an excellent post on the matter, click here.

Bicycle

It gets more amazing the longer you watch . . .



HT: neatorama

Quote of the Day

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

- Oscar Wilde

Medical Update - 4/22/09

Now where were we? Oi, these 70-hour work weeks are taking their toll. For example . . . 

Remember that CT Scan we had  a few weeks back? We never did get the results. 

You would think that the results of a scan of your child's head to check for hydrocephalus would be at the top of both your neurosurgeon's and your own personal list. We are so overloaded that the "no news is good news" approach is all we have been able to muster. But such is the situation we find ourselves in. 

I was talking to a co-worker about our experience this past year and one of the things I tried to explain was how hard it is to relate to other people sometimes. All your life's reference points are thrown off - what is a big deal to some does not even register with you. What is a routine matter to you is earth-shattering to others. What is difficult to you is unimaginable to others . . . it's not a complaint - it just a mildly interesting socio-dynamic  observation-thingy . . . or something . . .

Aaaaanyway . . .

As I mentioned before, we requested a Neuro consult when we were in the hospital last week as the wife thought she detected some swelling in Annie-Lu's noggin.

Monday the wife and child saw the Neuro and he pronounced everything "just fine". CT Scan from weeks ago was clear as well . . . good to know!

I joined the girls for the post-surgery check-up yesterday and the ortho pronounced everything on track. If you recall, they wrapped Annabelle's legs in fiberglass casts after the surgery and then cut the casts along the side and inserted spacers to accommodate any post-surgery swelling.

Yesterday they removed the spacers, squeezed the casts shut and wrapped them in another layer of fiberglass to keep them tight. Since the casts are fiberglass, we got to pick the color . . . hot pink, naturally . . .

So what's next? We head back to the ortho on May 26th at which time they will remove the casts and take out the pins in her feet. Then the orthodics folks will take a casting of her feet and ankles for the AFO's (Ankle-Foot-Orthosis). Then they wrap her back up in casts for another 5 weeks or so (the casts actually stay on until the AFOs are ready).

In the meantime we have Physical Therapy once a week to get Anna-ba-lu sitting up on her own.

Thank you for your prayers and support!

Cousin Crystal

The American Worker

I am a sucker for Creature Comforts - here's 3 new episodes online . . . 

Wrong Dog

It pains me to say that I have given up on Lileks. I used to read him first thing in the morning EVERYDAY but after a couple of years I couldn't bear it anymore (I am sure a handful of people feel the same way about TDR ater a couple of days . . .). But I do check in once in a while when I am stuck with NOTHING BETTER TO DO. When he is on, he is on:

Teaser:

The doorbell rang at 6:30, and Natalie lit up with delight: she’s here! Daisy’s here! I went to the door, and beheld a beautiful mutt with a silky red coat and a black muzzle. Perfect size. Smart face. Eager manner. This was our new dog!

Something inside of me said:

wrong dog

this is the wrong dog

Quote of the Day

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending and having the two as close together as possible.

- George Burns

Prayer

I received this in my e-mail yesterday:

I called him but he did not answer.

- Songs of Songs 5:6

Once the Lord has given us great faith, He has been known to test it with long delays.

He has allowed His servants' voices to echo in their ears, as if their prayers were re-bounding from a contemptuous sky. Believers have knocked at the heavenly gate, but it has remained immovable, as though its hinges had rusted. And like Jeremiah, they have cried, "You have covered yourself with a cloud so that no prayer can get through"

- Lam. 3:44

True saints of God have endured lengthy times of patient waiting with no reply, not
because their prayers were prayed without intensity, nor because God did not accept
their pleas. They were required to wait because it pleased Him who is sovereign and
who gives "according to his good purpose" (Phil. 2:13). And if it pleases Him to cause our patience to be exercised, should He not do as He desires with His own?

No prayer is ever lost, or any prayer ever breathed in vain. There is no such thing as prayer unanswered or unnoticed by God, and some things we see as refusals or de-
nials are simply delays.

- Horatius Bonar

Christ sometimes delays His help so He may test our faith and energize our prayers.
Our boat may be tossed by the waves while He continues to sleep, but He will awake
before it sinks. He sleeps but He never oversleeps, for He is never too late.

- Alexander Maclaren

Be still, sad soul! lift up no passionate cry,
But spread the desert of your being bare
To the full searching of the All-seeing eye;
Wait! and through dark misgiving, deep despair,
God will come down in pity, and fill the dry
Dead place with light, and life, and springlike air.

- John Campbell Shairp

He Looks Like a Miniature Buckley!

Thanks Michelle!

Just In Case You Were Feeling Coordinated . . .

Ahh Those Were The Days . . .

I actually worked at "Taco Hell" in High School . . . . back in the days when we wrote the orders on a plexiglass board with a  grease pencil . . .

Thanks Steve and Heather!

Two Wolves

Just had this one e-mailed to me this morning . . .


One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that goes on inside people. He said, 'My son, the battle is between 'two wolves' inside us all.

'One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.'

'The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith.'

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, 'Which wolf wins?'

The old Cherokee simply replied, 'The one you feed'

A Sunny Sunday Afternoon

Facebook Manners

This is the best thing I have seen in quite some time . . .

HT: neatorama

Ellie May

Amazing

A BRAVE girl who tragically lost all her limbs to meninigitis is learning to walk again.

Five-year-old Ellie May Challis has become the youngest person in the world to be fitted with special carbon framed limbs.

The youngster touched the hearts of people across the county as she defied the odds to survive the killer bug which she contracted in 2005.

Sadly Ellie May had to have all her limbs amputated eight weeks later.

HT: Neatorama

Medical Update - 4/15/09

12:48pm - Discharged

Neurology came by, gave Annie the once over and pronounced her okay. They do want to see her in their office on Monday morning just to double check.

So Neurology Monday morning to check the head for swelling and club foot clinic next Thursday to close up the casts for the next 5 weeks.

I am just waiting for the call to go pick up the girls . . . It will be nice to be home this evening.

Thank you for your prayers and support!

7am - Good Morning

Well we all made it through the night.

The wife thinks that Annie might have some swelling in her head (unrelated to yesterday's surgery) so since we are here, we asked for a neurology consult. Orthopedics has already come by and released us to go home but now we wait for neuro.

I am heading in to the office this morning and will return to pick up the girls when they are discharged later today. So now what?

Annie has two fiberglass casts on her legs but they are split up the side to allow for any surgery-related swelling. We will return to the club foot clinic next Thursday to have her casts effectively clamped shut for the next 5 weeks or so.

5 weeks after that, we will return to have the current casts removed, the pins in her feet and ankles removed, and new casts put on for another 5 weeks or so.

The real trick is going to be keeping little Houdini-belle from slipping out of her casts. If you imagine your foot cast at a right ankle, the only way you can slip the cast off is to have your foot point downwards to make the bend in the cast - which we of course want to avoid. So we will need to watch that carefully.

Thank you for all your prayers, comments and emails of support. Although we may not answer every phone call or e-mail during these times, they really give us a lift and help us keep our heads about us.

Thank you thank you thank you!

10 weeks until shoe shopping!

Mother's Day Movie #3

Mother



Submit your Mother's Day movie suggestions in the comments or e-mail them to matthew.m.linden@gmail.com

Annabelle's

Awesome.

From San Francisco:

Thanks Heather!

Love It

Love it Love it.

HT: QS

Heavenly Potatoes and Ham

“Red potatoes, ham, cheese, and green onion accentuate a creamy mixture with a crumbly, heavenly topping. This rich, hearty dish is sure to please the whole family.”

RECIPE HERE

Go Annabelle Day - 4/14/09

=Updated Throughout the Day=

9:54 pm - 95%

Wife and child are both asleep - I am down the hall in a bunk room with 6 other parents all sleeping on reclining hospital chairs.

Annabelle seems to be bouncing right back as usual. She is smiling and happy. She nursed really well (according to the wife) and does not seem to be in any discomfort. My guess is that she is about 95% recovered.

All in all, a sucessful day at the hospital. It will be good to get home tomorrow . . . 

6:59 - Did I say "Room" 153?

Just when you think you have the system wired . . . .

When we were here in January, we spent the night in the wing of a hospital where we had a private room, bathroom and a shared balcony . . . *ahem*

This go-round we are in a room with three beds - one of which is vacant. The bathroom is waaaaay down the hall.

The other family seems like one that we would get along with but they are eating dinner in their corner of the room while we all benignly eye each other . . . sizing each other up . . .

Fortunately, I brought the big guns . . . chocolate chip and oatmeal raisin cookies. They are for the nurses station but I think we will take care of our room mates first . . .

Annie is still sleeping soundly although she opens her eyes from time to time and groggily looks around. We will all feel better once she is awake enough to nurse.

Your continued prayers are appreciated!

5:58 -Room 153

I got to go into recovery and be there when Annie opened her eyes for the first time. All the surgery stuff aside, the thing that hurts my heart the most is the thought that my little girl would experience fear and anxiety when she wakes up groggy in a strange place. So it was a real blessing for me to be there.

The wife is in recovery for the duration until we get moved to our room - #153.

Updates to follow . . .

5:45 - Recovery

The wife is in the recovery room with the wee one. Mom's get to go first because, well, when they announce "One parent to recovery room" the wife has that "I'm going to see my baby and anyone in my way is going to get dead" look about her . . . I will sit quietly and wait . . . gladly . . .

5:08 - Post-Op Consult

As we were sitting in the Cafeteria - Holly lost in her thoughts and me lost on the Internet - who should sit down opposite us but Doc Wallace himself. "I thought I would find you guys here . . ." he said.

Here is the run-down . . .

Doc explained that the surgery went faster than expected because he had an excellent team helping him.

They were able to get Annie-Lu's feet to "almost" a 90 degree angle. They are still pointed down somewhat but they are most definitely better than they were.

The doc explained that once they got "in there" they discovered that Annie has some pretty significant structural deformities. As he described it, there is a certain sort of "chicken and egg" scenario . . . Was the casting not totally successful because her bones are malformed and fused together? Or did the casting process itself exacerbate the malformations and fusing? There is no way to tell.

I asked if she would eventually be able to wear normal shoes and he assured me that she would.

I asked the doc if he anticipated future surgeries and he said only if her feet start to bend or twist in the future but that would most likely be many years down the road if at all . . .

So now what? We wait some more . . .

When people are put under, the pain from the surgery is what prompts the body to wake up. Since it seems that Annabelle probably doesn't have feeling in her feet, there is no reason for her to wake up. She's going to get her money's worth from all those good drugs . . .

They expect her to wake up around 5:45 or so at which time we will be allowed into recovery one at a time to check  on her . . .

Then it is off to our room for the night. . .

Updates to follow . . .

4:38 - Grasping at Straws . . . err . . . Snack Food . . .

The worst part of all the waiting is the overwhelming feeling you have to JUST DO SOMETHING. 

You want to do something constructive . . . something to help . . . but, of course, there is NOTHING YOU CAN DO BUT WAIT. 

So you go to the cafeteria and you get some lunch. . .

Then you check your e-mail. . .

Then you read some blogs. . .

Then you update your own blog. . .

Then you chat a little . . . 

Then you are left with nothing to do but wait . . . 

There is nothing to read . . .  

Nothing to talk about . . . 

You're not hungry so there is no need for more food . . . and yet . . . 

YOU MUST DO SOMETHING . . . 

So you start to look around for something to do and you start to think . . . 

I COULD TOTALLY EAT ALL THOSE CHEETOS . . .  THAT'S SOMETHING I COULD DO! . . . 

Ugggh . . .

Good thing the surgery is almost complete . . .

4:18 - Update

I just went up to check on the progress. The nurse called back to the OR and the report came that they are closing her up and preparing to cast her legs. We are relieved that the surgery will only end up being 2 1/2 hours as opposed to the 3-4 hours they had predicted.

Of course, the $64k question is, "Why?"

We should get called up for our post-op review with the doc around 5pm. Then we probably have a hour in recovery before we head to our room for the night.

Updates to follow.

Your continued prayers are appreciated!

2:45 - Surgery

Well we finally got into surgery around 2:30pm. It has been a long haul for the wee-one. Despite moments of tired, hungry fussiness she was a real trooper as usual and she smiled and giggled at the nurse who carried her through the OR doors.

And no, it doesn't get easier - you just learn how to deal with it better . . .

One of the low points for me was when the surgeon was explaining the procedure to us. First, a little medical stuff:

Your muscles are attached to your bones by ligaments and tendons. When your muscle contracts, it pulls on that connecting tissue which moves your skeleton. In Annabelle's case, her feet are positioned the way they are because the muscles and tendons are continuously pulling in one direction. It isn't because the muscle is contracting. It's because her skeleton is growing faster than the muscles and tendons in her legs and feet which should be keeping pace. Basically, the muscles are acting like pieces of rope that are too short. There are two basic ways to solve this issue.

First off, the doctor can go in and do a sort of lengthening procedure (adding a little more rope). This would take the pressure off her feet and allow them to be positioned properly. Unfortunately, this would be a temporary fix in Annie's case as her muscles and tendons most likely will not keep pace with the growth of her bones in the future and we will find ourselves in the same position months or years down the road.

The other option is sort of like a "tendonectomy" in which the doctor goes in and just cuts the tendons where they are attached. This frees the feet to move and grow with a much smaller incidence of recurrence. This is the approach they are taking with Annie today. Naturally, the docs are intent on preserving everything they can and yet still accomplishing the goal.

Ever since this saga began, we have lived a dichotomy between being prayerful and hopeful and yet accepting reality as it comes. It's not easy.

We are just now starting to consider (accept is not a word I am comfortable with) what life will be like with the likely possibility of a wheelchair in our little family. Its not something that we are capable of having a long drawn out discussion about yet - we just sort of mention little snippets in passing . . . and then get back to praying and hoping.

Today feels like a big push in the wheelchair direction. 

It's okay. We're okay. It's just one of those things that we are gradually coming to grips with.

The surgery should last 3-4 hours which means Annie should be out by 5:30-6:30pm.

I plan on checking in with the docs around 4:30. 

We will keep everyone posted - your prayers are coveted and appreciated!

11:54 - Check-In to the 3rd Degree

General Surgical check-in at 11am (ie. "pay-up") - done (no toy with $250 purchase this time).

Surgical suites check-in at 11:15 (ie: vital signs . . . here's your gown) - done

Pre-op Check-in at 11:30 (ie: soooo, you say you're here for an operation?? Here's the general plan)

Now in the surgical waiting room waiting for the pre-op consult with the docs and the big hand-off . . . .

Everything has gone better than planned today - Annie woke up at 6:15 and fed until 7am (the cut-off). Then she drank Pedialyte (baby Gatorade) from 9:15 to 10am (the cut-off time). Every thing has just been falling into place today . . . so far so good . . .

10am - Experience

Now that we have been through this before, it is funny how different our preparation is. For instance, here are some items you would not typically think to pack that we have learned to bring:

1) Foam camping mattress: One parent is allowed to sleep in the room with Annie, the other gets booted to a conference room with a padded bench along one wall. All the "extra" parents share the same room (and) padded bench. If I don't get there in time I will be sleeping on the floor . . .

2) Fleece Bedroll: (see item #1 above)

3) 2 Pillows: Because putting my head on a hospital pillow all night sort of gives me the willies (like airplane pillows)

4) DVD's: each room is equipped with a tv/dvd player combo

5) Fresh Baked cookies for the nurses: For goodness sakes they stay up all night mothering us. It's the least we can do. It's not a bribe! It's a heartfelt gesture to those in a position to get us what we need. "potato" "potaato"

6) $250: Co-pay. We were caught unawares last time and this time we were able to budget it in.

Things you would assume you need but actually don't:

Baby Formula: The place is bursting with it and the nurses beg you to take some with you when you leave

Did I mention we are totally running ahead of schedule this morning??

9:27am - Praying for Annabelle. Nice! Thank You!

6am - Heading into the office to get some work done early before going back home to pick up the girls. Have the Dawg in the office with me - going to be dropping him off at his girlfriend's this morning for a slumber party.

The End of a Long Hard Day at Work

This Day In History

144 Years Ago Today

Lincoln is shot

On this day in 1865, John Wilkes Booth, an actor and Confederate sympathizer, fatally shoots President Abraham Lincoln at a play at Ford's Theater in Washington, D.C. The attack came only five days after Confederate General Robert E. Lee surrendered his massive army at Appomattox Court House, Virginia, effectively ending the American Civil War.

97 Years Ago Today

RMS Titanic hits iceberg

Just before midnight in the North Atlantic, the RMS Titanic fails to divert its course from an iceberg, ruptures its hull, and begins to sink.
Four days earlier, the Titanic, one of the largest and most luxurious ocean liners ever built, departed Southampton, England, on its maiden voyage across the Atlantic Ocean. While leaving port, the massive ship came within a couple of feet of the steamer New York but passed safely by, causing a general sigh of relief from the passengers massed on the ship's decks.

Mother's Day Movies!

Next up? Mother's Day! This is your chance to send in your recommendations for movies where mothers play a prominent roll (and all you wise-acres can just forget about Mommy Dearest or Psycho because I won't post about them . . .)

The movie doesn't necessarily have to set mother's on a pedestal so much as just highlight them in a non-horror-movie-sort-of-way.

For my contribution, how can you go wrong with a movie who's most famous tag line begins, "My momma . . . ."

Oh shoot . . . . I just remembered . . . my wife asked me to post a movie for Valentine's Day and I refused on the grounds that it was more of an Easter movie. There was actually quite the discussion about it in our household and emotions ran high . . . then, of course, I forgot to post it along with the other Easter movies . . . . so if you haven't finished all your Peeps from the Easter bunny yet, whip up another batch of deviled eggs and pop in Chocolat . . . you (and my wife) will be glad you did . . .



My wife actually just made a good point that it would also be an excellent Mother's Day movie and just about perfect to be posted today . . . . See? I had it planned all along . . .

Daffodils

by William Wordsworth

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazed - and gazed - but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

Quote of the Day

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe."

- Albert Einstein

Apricot Brown Sugar Ham

"This succulent ham is a family favorite that I've adapted for my own tastes. This makes an amazing Easter dinner ham that complements many side dishes."

LINK HERE

What If . . .

Mark Smith has his most recent installment of the Powerchair Diaries up. Always worth a read . . .

Teaser:

See, a lot of times it’s not the seeming physical realities of our disabilities or lives that limit us, but our own narrow thinking. And, so, I got to really thinking about boats again over the past year, wondering, Is it truly impossible for me to ever own and operate a boat again, or am I boxing myself in, preventing pursuing among my foremost lifelong passions due to narrow thinking? More bluntly, was I letting my perception of my disability keep me from living to my fullest? In fact, from time to time, I said to my family the dreaded only-if statement: Only-if it wasn’t for my situation – if only I didn’t have cerebral palsy – I’d have another boat in a heartbeat….

Such only-if thinking never works, though, and I know that whenever in life I’ve found myself going into only-if mode, I’ve needed to turn my bow into the wind, and start thinking what-ifs?, steering myself toward a more positive horizon.

To turn my boating only-ifs into what-ifs?, I made a list of what I literally couldn’t do when it came to boating, then I tried to come up with a creative what-if? question for each problem, seeing if the thought process might lead me to solutions:

I don’t live near coastal waters, but what-if there’s a terrific lake in my area for boating that I’ve overlooked?

I can’t trailer, launch, or store a boat; but, what-if it was permanently birthed somewhere, in the water, ready to go, at a wheelchair-accessible dock?

I can’t climb aboard a boat, but what-if there’s a style of boat that I could somehow transfer onto myself?

Boats are expensive, but what-if there are the less-costly alternatives?

So, I spent the winter working through the possible what-if? answers, limited not by my physical disability, but by only focusing on creative solutions. And, where the answers led me was surprising.

Spring Afternoon Light

Resurrection Day

A rumbling in the pre-dawn darkness - a shaking of the earth - soldiers' courage shatter and they fall down as if dead - the crackling, scraping and crunching as a huge stone is carelessly tossed aside as little more than a minor inconvenience - the burial clothes lying hollow and empty as death itself - and the light . . . the blinding light of an angel's garments that shine like lightning . . . Easter has come.

The creation story was good . . . Moses and the Red Sea, well, my goodness . . . Christmas morning was a morning like no other . . . then Good Friday . . . 

Curiously, unlike Christmas morning, there are no choirs of angels on Easter . . . I like to think it is because even they were struck dumb with wonder . . . some covering their gaping mouths in astonishment . . . while others hid their faces in their hands - crying tears for the sheer terrifying beauty of it all.

But this Easter morn my thoughts are not only of that day of days so long ago but of the many resurrections we see all around us as we journey through this life . . . relationships forever broken only to be healed once more . . . those who battle addictions who finally break the chains . . . those mired in their own despair who yet choose to get up and greet the dawn . . .

Those huddled around their pitifully small flickering flame of hope - guarding it with their last ounce of strength against all of life's storms even after all others have given up . . .

When scientists say it is not possible and philosophers say it is not logical . . . When family says hope is gone and friends say the damage is beyond repair . . . when counselors say it is not reasonable and the doctors say it is terminal . . . When all the world shakes it's finger, wags it's head and pronounces . . . Death . . .

God replies, "Death? What do you think you know about death . . .?"

Then slowly, quietly, and oh, so gently, he kneels down next to us in the cold darkness of our tomb, cups his hands around ours so desperate to keep that small flame of hope alive and says, "Would you mind if I warm myself by your fire . . .?"

We become that small boy with the loaves and fishes . . . the widow with her last penny . . . the disciple who cries out "help my unbelief" . . .

And after kneeling quietly in the darkness with us for a time . . . the God of the universe stands, stretches and says "Thank you for sharing with me what you have . . . now may I share myself with you . . .?"

and bushes blaze . . .

waters part . . .

lightening cracks across our doubtful sky . . .

and the very stones that sealed our fate begin to roll away . . . 

that which we were told was hopeless and impossible suddenly becomes the new reality . . . 

the deaf begin to hear . . .

the blind begin to see . . .

the lame pick up their mats and walk . . .

From all corners of the earth people cry "not possible!" . . . "not logical!" . . . "hope is gone!" . . . "the damage is beyond repair!" . . . "not reasonable!" . . .  "it is terminal!" . . . with one chorus the world cries "DEATH!"

It is then that God stands to his full height . . . stretches his arms wide as he once did just three days ago . . . shakes his wild hair and beard, throws his head back and laughs . . . a hearty . . .bellowing . . . heart-full laugh . . . and roars a reply that reverberates through all of his creation . . . "DEATH?! What do you think you know about death . . .?"

No, this year of all years, this resurrection morn is not golden trumpets and angels clothed in lightening . . . no . . . for me . . . this Easter morn looks more like this . . . .

Who knows? Maybe the silence of that first Easter morn was not broken with a shattering of shield and a quaking of souls so much as it was broken by a jangling of cheap beads . . a giggle . . . and then a chuckle . . . and then a laugh so pure that only one who had humbled his heart like that of a little child could utter it . . . and the women who heard it had to laugh in spite of themselves as their hearts swelled with the hope and joy of all creation . . .

Happy Easter.

Easter Sermon

By St. John Chrysostom, 5th century Patriarch of Constantinople

Are there any who are devout lovers of God?
Let them enjoy this beautiful bright festival!

Are there any who are grateful servants?
Let them rejoice and enter into the joy of their Lord!

Are there any weary with fasting?
Let them now receive their wages!

If any have toiled from the first hour,
let them receive their due reward;
If any have come after the third hour,
let him with gratitude join in the Feast!
And he that arrived after the sixth hour,
let him not doubt; for he too shall sustain no loss.
And if any delayed until the ninth hour,
let him not hesitate; but let him come too.
And he who arrived only at the eleventh hour,
let him not be afraid by reason of his delay.
For the Lord is gracious and receives the last even as the first.
He gives rest to him that comes at the eleventh hour,
as well as to him that toiled from the first.

To this one He gives, and upon another He bestows.
He accepts the works as He greets the endeavor.
The deed He honors and the intention He commends.
Let us all enter into the joy of the Lord!

First and last alike receive your reward;
rich and poor, rejoice together!
Sober and slothful, celebrate the day!
You that have kept the fast, and you that have not,
rejoice today for the Table is richly laden!

Feast royally on it, the calf is a fatted one.
Let no one go away hungry. Partake, all, of the cup of faith.
Enjoy all the riches of His goodness!

Let no one grieve at his poverty,
for the universal kingdom has been revealed.

Let no one mourn that he has fallen again and again;
for forgiveness has risen from the grave.

Let no one fear death, for the Death of our Savior has set us free.
He has destroyed it by enduring it.
He destroyed Hell when He descended into it.
He put it into an uproar even as it tasted of His flesh.

Isaiah foretold this when he said,
“You, O Hell, have been troubled by encountering Him below.”
Hell was in an uproar because it was done away with.
It was in an uproar because it is mocked.
It was in an uproar, for it is destroyed.
It is in an uproar, for it is annihilated.
It is in an uproar, for it is now made captive.

Hell took a body, and discovered God.
It took earth, and encountered Heaven.
It took what it saw, and was overcome by what it did not see.

O death, where is thy sting?
O Hell, where is thy victory?

Christ is Risen, and you, o death, are annihilated!
Christ is Risen, and the evil ones are cast down!
Christ is Risen, and the angels rejoice!
Christ is Risen, and life is liberated!

Christ is Risen, and the tomb is emptied of its dead;
for Christ having risen from the dead,
is become the first-fruits of those who have fallen asleep.

To Him be Glory and Power forever and ever. Amen!

God's Own Fool

by Michael Card

It seems I've imagined Him all of my life
As the wisest of all of mankind
But if God's Holy wisdom is foolish to men
He must have seemed out of His mind

For even His family said He was mad
And the priest said a demon's to blame
But God in the form of this angry young man
Could not have seemed perfectly sane

When we in our foolishness thought we were wise
He played the fool and He opened our eyes
When we in our weakness believed we were strong
He became helpless to show we were wrong

So we follow God's own Fool
For only the foolish can tell
Believe the unbelievable
Come be a fool as well

Come lose your life for a carpenter's son
For a madman who died for a dream
Then you'll have the faith His first followers had
And you'll feel the weight of the beam

So surrender the hunger to say you must know
Have the courage to say, "I believe"
For the power of paradox opens your eyes
And blinds those who say they can see

So we follow God's own Fool
For only the foolish can tell
Believe the unbelievable
Come be a fool as well

The Maker of the Universe

by Phil Keaggy

The Maker of the universe,
As Man for man was made a curse.
The claims of Law which He had made,
Unto the uttermost He paid.
His holy fingers made the bough,
Which grew the thorns that crowned His brow.
The nails that pierced His hands were mined
In secret places He designed.

He made the forest whence there sprung
The tree on which His body hung.
He died upon a cross of wood,
Yet made the hill on which it stood.
The sky that darkened o'er His head,
By Him above the earth was spread.
The sun that hid from Him it's face
By His decree was poised in space.

The spear which spilled His precious blood
Was tempered in the fires of God.
The grave in which His form was laid
Was hewn in rocks His hands had made.

The throne on which He now appears
Was His for everlasting years.
But a new glory crowns His brow
And every knee to Him shall bow.

This Road

by Jars of Clay

All heavy laden acquainted with sorrow
May Christ in our marrow, carry us home
From alabaster come blessings of laughter
A fragrance of passion and joy from the truth

Grant the unbroken tears ever flowing
From hearts of contrition only for You
May sin never hold true that love never broke through
For God's mercy holds us and we are His own

This road that we travel, may it be the straight and narrow
God give us peace and grace from You, all the day
Shelter with fire, our voices we raise still higher
God give us peace and grace from You, all the day through

The Bunny Cometh . . .

Medical Update - 3/7/9

So this past Tuesday we went back to the Club Foot clinic for our pre-op consultation. Everything is a "Go".

For those who don't remember, or can't keep track . . . little Annie-lu was born with two clubbed feet. A very strange term that brings to mind very inaccurate images . . .

Basically, if you sit in a chair and turn your ankle so that the outside (pinky) edge of your foot is on the floor with the sole facing your opposite foot, you start to get an idea. Now keep bending your ankle until the arch of your foot actually touches the inside of your ankle. That's a clubbed foot (at least in Annie's case).

We went through the casting process this past fall for 9 or 10 weeks with remarkable results. Unfortunately, casting alone will not get us where we need to be. Surgery is scheduled for this Tuesday. I did my best to explain the procedure in a previous post and I haven't learned much more about it since then. I do know that it seems a lot more real today than it did 3 months ago.

When I was a child we had a community swimming pool called the key-hole because of it's shape. It is where my mother took me to swimming lessons. My family would go there on hot 1970's summer afternoons. The summer day camp I attended when my mother went back to work swam at the pool once a week. If my memory is correct, people stopped going to the pool in the 80's when the AIDS scare was at it's height and people thought you could contract HIV from a public pool. They eventually filled it in . . . . But I digress . . .

The pool had three diving boards - two short and one tall. I can still feel my pulse quicken when I think back to what it was like to stand at the far edge of the pool thinking, "I can do that" and the vast chlorinated ocean of difference there was in actually standing at the end of that board a seeming mile in the sky - with the whole world watching . . .

That's sort of what it feels like now that the day is upon us. We are standing at the edge of the diving board, toes curled over, dizzy from the height, wanting to climb back down the ladder yet knowing that in the end everything is going to be just fine. We just have to not throw up in front of all these people . . . or pee our pants . . . don't puke and don't pee . . . at least not until you are safely in back in the water . . . which is why it was also known as the "Pee-hole" . . . maybe that's why they closed it down . . .

Check in is at 11am with the surgery scheduled at 1pm. From what I guess, the surgery will last a couple of hours and then we will all spend the night at the hospital Tuesday night. Holly has the day off Wednesday but I will need to head back to the office . . .

We will do our best to keep everyone posted on the big day.

That's the latest. 

"Go Annabelle" day is Tuesday, April 14th. Sport-em if you got 'em.

*GASP!*

*CHOKE* - *COUGH* - *SPUTTER* - *AAAACHHHHHH!* - *HOARK!* . . . .

Do I have anything on my face?

Don't mind me, I'm just coming up for air . . . . 

Well things certainly seem to be picking up in the Title and Escrow biz. I have been working pretty much 4am-5pm five or six days a week for the past 5 weeks now. That means up at 3am - at my desk by 4am - no breaks, no lunch, home by 5:30 or 6pm depending on traffic and then in bed again by 8-8:30pm. Which leaves 2-2 1/2 whole waking hours in which I have to eat dinner, see the wife and child and take a shower.

Saturdays I watch Annie while the wife is at work. Sundays are split between getting reacquainted with the family and doing yard work. Which doesn't leave much time for the ol' blog or anything else for that matter. Did I mention that business is picking up?? That's a good thing.

Yesterday was the first day in weeks that the job was not utter pandemonium so I am hopeful that I might be able to get back into a more balanced routine this coming week . . . heh, yeah, right . . .

Cheap and Yum: Tuna Melts

My wife makes a great "kitchen sink" tuna melt. Tuna, mayo, garlic, peppers, cheese etc. I figure even with the extras, you can feed two people for about $2-3.

Submit your Cheap and Yum recipe ideas in the comments or e-mail to matthew.m.linden@gmail.com 

The Dawg

Bashful

Love it

Unicorn

Trying Not to Cry In Front Of My Co-workers

Grab a hankie . . .

Cheap and Yum - Poorman's Cake

I have made this recipe since Ryan was a “wee one.”

POOR MAN’S CAKE

Mix together:

3 cups flour
2 cups sugar
1 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons baking soda
6 tablespoons baking cocoa

Add:

2 cups water
1 cup canola oil
2 teaspoons vanilla

Mix wet and dry ingredients and bake 35 minutes in a 9x13” pan at 350 degrees.

Submit your "Cheap and Yum" recipe's in the comments or e-mail them to Matthew.m.linden@gmail.com 

Can You See Me Out there?

2572 Years Ago Today

Buddhists celebrate birth of Gautama Buddha

On this day, Buddhists celebrate the commemoration of the birth of Gautama Buddha, the founder of Buddhism, thought to have lived in India from 563 B.C. to 483 B.C. Actually, the Buddhist tradition that celebrates his birthday on April 8 originally placed his birth in the 11th century B.C., and it was not until the modern era that scholars determined that he was more likely born in the sixth century B.C., and possibly in May rather than April.

Now This is Interesting . .

VFTW has a post on home-made cleaning products that are earth-friendly . . . 

Good stuff.

Of course, I am too tired, worn out and pre-occupied to ever get around to doing it . . . but someone autta . . .

Run

A nice post from TMST on running . . . 

Quote of the Day

"My father always used to say that when you die, if you've got five real friends, then you've had a great life."

- Lee Iacocca

Dave's Mocha Chicken

“Coffee, sherry, brown sugar, and soy sauce compose an interesting and tasty marinade for chicken.”

RECIPE HERE

We Can Go Backwards . . . .

Via Neatorama comes this story of prehistoric people's caring for children born with disabilities . . . .

The discovery of the oldest known infant born with a skull deformity hints that, contrary to popular belief, early humans might not have immediately abandoned or killed their abnormal offspring, a new study says.

Many mammals are known to reject newborns with severe deformities. Scientists had therefore assumed that ancient humans behaved likewise.

But a new study shows that a 530,000-year-old fossil skull belonged to a child who lived to around the age of ten despite being born with a rare birth defect known as craniosynostosis, in which the skull segments close too early, interfering with brain development.

Increased pressure on the brain due to the deformity might have led to learning difficulties and health problems such as mental retardation.

"All children need care," noted study team leader Ana Gracia of the Centro UCM-ISCIII de Evolución y Comportamientos Humanos in Madrid.

But this child would likely have required "special need care" to have lived as long as it did, she said.

We like to think that we are more advanced than primitive peoples just because we have cars and computers . . . that is not necessarily the case . . .

I Want One . . .

HT: Neatorama

395 Years Ago Today

Pocahontas marries John Rolfe

Pocahontas, daughter of the chief of the Powhatan Indian confederacy, marries English tobacco planter John Rolfe in Jamestown, Virginia. The marriage ensured peace between the Jamestown settlers and the Powhatan Indians for several years.

All You Do Is Twitter . . . You Should Get Out More . . . Like Facebook . . .

This post over at TMST got me thinking about a recent episode of Whadda Ya Know. One of their guests was Julia Angwin, author of Stealing MySpace: The Battle to Control the Most Popular Website in America.

They discussed the creation of MySpace and the differences between Facebook and Twitter. I know next to nothing about all three although I do play in the shallow end of Twitter.

From what I understand, MySpace let's you decorate your page in an infinite number of ways. All Facebook pages are essentially the same and on Twitter you don't even have a page - you are basically your own wire service - sending messages into the void.

It's funny to me that Facebook is considered "relational" while Twitter is somehow anti social. It reminds me of a time about 10 years ago when Internet grocery shopping was all the buzz. You could go online, pick out your groceries, and have them delivered to your door. I was a big proponent. I could get up in the morning and do all my grocery shopping for the week in the space of time it took me to drink a cup of coffee.

"But you are cutting yourself off from the world!" friends cried. "What about the human interaction that you get from going to the store?" 

Eventually my friends admitted that they didn't actually talk to anyone at the grocery store except the checkout girl and maybe the guy at the meat counter and no one could recall the employee's names . . . no one had actually ever met and made a real-life friend at a grocery store . . .

To me, Facebook is relational in the way that a trip to a grocery store is an uplifting societal experience - not very.

One of the interesting things they postulated on the show was that Twitter is the essence of Myspace and Facebook stripped of all the illusions of friendship. According to them, if a person isn't a real friend to you in real life, they aren't a real friend with you on Facebook. Twitter is the reality of MS and FB.

But then again, some people meet and get married through the net. So who knows.

One thing is for sure, getting poked on FB is no substitute for getting poked in your living room. And that's all I have to blog about that . . .